Orient Express

Sunday, December 28, 2014
the pain isn't going away at 4:42 PM

It's a really difficult thing in life to have somebody there for you.

The pain, the pain, it isn't going away.

Why do i have everything to give yet i feel so hollow and empty inside and trapped in loneliness?

Everything is so fragile.

Nothing is a given. Nothing..nothing..nothing..

How long do i have to fight alone?

Uneasiness and a slight choking feeling builds up in my chest. I get no empathy, no unconditional love.

Im left in my own dark cloud to try and breathe on my own. Where is my soulmate?

I take and accept everything mean done to me, why cant i be treated lovingly respectfully and sweetly when i really need it?

I keep giving and then suffering. And i give another chance. When will i finally lose hope? Physically gripped, shaken, as well as emotionally, with talks of a broken ending. A broken future is spoken of to me.

Is there a pot of love which doesnt have my name on it? I probably am condemned to forever loneliness trapped inside this dark cloud, continuously trying to struggle to breathe. Why doesnt he want to come inside and hold my hand? Maybe the cloud will dissipate and i will finally he able to breathe again if he helped.

Maybe i need to pretend im okay and he doesnt need to help me for it to work. Maybe my life needs to be a huge big act for him to love me.

pain goes away over time but sometimes the hurt never goes away, it can only fade. when people focus on what they have, what they have to give and how they're treated they're unable to see the whole picture. take a step back and look at everything and you'll see your future isn't as broken and the fallen pieces will unscramble and start to fit together once again.

loneliness isn't thrown at you, it's build up and it can hurt and strangle you... sometimes it will never completely fade even when you're surrounded by people but when you have someone who is able to make you feel happy, who is willing to hold your hand and respects you for who you are then you will be able to be loved better. you don't need to pretend, just be yourself.

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